How to Stop Letting Your Money Mindset Stress You Out

By Maggie Glennon, M.Ed ,Madeline Farquharson, CPCC

Let's talk about that sometimes intimidating, often mysterious, and definitely omnipresent entity in our lives – moolah, greenbacks, cold hard cash... or as most people call it, money.

Now, deep in the recesses of our beautiful minds, we all have a little pocket where we store our beliefs and feelings about money. This is what the wise ones call your 'money mindset.' Funny enough, no one handed us a manual on how to foster a healthy relationship with our finances – it's almost like expecting us to know how to perform a triple pirouette without a single ballet lesson.

And here’s a not-so-fun fact: a recent study pointed out that money woes top the chart as the ultimate mood buster for adults in the U.S. Yikes, right? The money anxiety that we often feel we “have under control” can really wreak havoc. Getting to grips with your money mindset affects not just how much your bank account likes you, but can spruce up your whole life vibe.

So, if you’ve ever felt like your money mindset is playing hide and seek with your peace of mind, or if you're just curious about financial self-awareness – this article is for you. We’ve got the ultimate toolkit to help you start shifting towards a money mindset that helps you live rich with what you’ve got.

Signs of an Unhealthy Money Mindset

It's time to play a little game of financial detective (snazzy hat optional, but encouraged). Identifying an unhealthy money mindset isn't about a magnifying glass and a list of complicated symptoms. It's usually quite straightforward—like realizing that every financial decision you make is accompanied by a little choir of 'what ifs' and 'oh noes' singing in the background of your mind.

Simply put, if your financial decisions are often rooted in fear and draped with uncertainty, it might be a flashing neon sign pointing to an unhealthy money mindset. Let’s have a look at some of the common signs that you may be treading on dangerous mental waters.

Here are some signs that you may have an unhealthy money mindset:

  • You feel uncomfortable when talking about money.
  • You frequently worry or stress about money.
  • You often have negative self-talk around money
  • You engage in emotional spending or have frequent regrets about purchases.
  • You have a fear of taking financial risks.
  • You notice anxiety when thinking about the future.

Next, you can review what a healthy money mindset looks like and then explore practical ways to move toward it.

Signs of a Healthy Money Mindset

Now that we’ve tackled the “not-so-great,” it’s time to embrace the glittering signs of a happy, healthy money mindset. Picture this: you’re standing at a crossroads, and instead of being guided by a frantic parade of worries, your deep-seated values take the lead, steering you gracefully towards choices that resonate with your heart.

Imagine prioritizing a painting class that nourishes your soul, over a weekend away, simply because you value creativity and learning more in that moment. A healthy money mindset is all about letting your cherished values take the front seat, guiding you to make decisions that are as fulfilling as a perfect cup of tea on a rainy day.

Let’s wander down the sunny path of financial self-awareness where your choices are rooted in values, not fears, and discover how money can become a delightful tool in painting the canvas of your life.

Here are other signs you have a healthy money mindset:

  • You focus on opportunities.
  • You are confident in how you spend your money.
  • You have a generosity and willingness to share.
  • You are comfortable discussing financial matters.
  • You spend/invest in alignment with your values.
  • You check in with yourself frequently on your priorities.

Stepping into this type of attitude can take time and support. Programs like Knomii Fundamentals are excellent for gaining clarity about your values and in turn, improving the health of your money mindset.

How to Create a Positive Money Mindset

Feeling a bit seen in the unhealthy mindset section? No worries at all; recognizing it is half the battle won. It’s both comforting and true to say that shifting to a positive money mindset is entirely within reach. And here’s a gold star for you: simply by being here, embracing your curiosity and acknowledging the patterns that don’t serve you well, you’ve already danced a good few steps down the path to change.

We won’t sugarcoat it – reshaping beliefs and attitudes that have kept you company for years is a gradual process, a journey rather than a quick sprint. Here are some tools and exercises for changing your money mindset to something that will help you see abundance over scarcity, and opportunity over loss.

Aligning Your Spending With Your Values

It goes without saying (but here we are saying it anyways) that one of the keys to a healthy money mindset is starting with your values. All too often we make money itself a value instead of allowing it to be a resource or tool we can use to express our true values.

To shift your mindset toward seeing money as a tool, here’s a little exercise you can try:

  1. Identify Your Core Values: Start by listing down your core values. These could be things like creativity, family, freedom, health, etc. Try to identify around 5-7 values that truly resonate with you.
  2. Review Your Expenses: Next, take a detailed look at your monthly expenses. Write down everything you spend money on in a month, including bills, groceries, entertainment, and so on.
  3. Align Your Expenses with Your Values: Now, it’s time to align your expenses with your values. For each expense, ask yourself which value it relates to. You might find that some of your spending doesn't align with any of your core values.
  4. Reflect and Adjust: Reflect on the findings. Are there expenses that don’t resonate with any of your core values? Consider whether it is possible to reduce or eliminate these expenses, and instead channel more of your budget into areas that reflect your values.
  5. Envision Your Values-Aligned Budget: Imagine a budget where the majority of your spending is a direct expression of your values. How does this make you feel? Excited, peaceful, satisfied?
  6. Implement Your Values-Aligned Budget: Begin to implement your new, values-aligned budget. It might not be possible to make all the changes overnight, but start with small adjustments and build from there.
  7. Regular Check-Ins: Make it a practice to review your budget regularly (e.g., monthly or quarterly) to ensure that you are continually aligning your spending with your values, making adjustments as necessary.

Remember to be flexible in this exercise. Things change; the priority we put on each value shifts over time. We need to be able to check in with ourselves and decide where to focus our attention and our resources - money especially!

Not sure what your core values are? We do a deep dive on this in the Knomii Fundamentals. It’s a community-based exploration of self from the comfort of your own home! Together with curious people like you, we enjoy self-exploration because we know that knowing ourselves better helps us live happier, more fulfilling lives. And why not learn how to do that while forming deep, meaningful friendships?

Money Mindset Exercises

Just as we all have our own favorite ways to break a sweat (be it yoga, dancing, or a brisk walk in the park), nurturing our money mindset comes in various shapes and sizes too. There are many ways to find one that fits you perfectly, one that resonates with your style and pace. Let’s explore a variety of practices together, helping you sculpt a money mindset that's as healthy and strong as it is joyful.

Journal Prompts to Develop Your Money Mindset

Set aside a few minutes once or twice a week and journal about these prompts to help you gain clarity. And if you’re not a writer, that’s fine too! Leave a voice message to yourself.

  • Imagine a life where you managed your money with intent and purpose. What types of things do you see yourself doing? What types of things would you be thinking or feeling?
  • Write at least 3 limiting beliefs you have about money and then reframe them into positive affirmations. For example: “I will always have to work tirelessly for my money” turns into “Money is always flowing easily in my direction”.
  • Write about what your definition of financial success looks like. How would you know if you achieved this goal?

Write a Money Biography

Money mindsets are also shaped by personal and family history. Writing a Money Biography is an excellent way to examine the origins of your beliefs and assess whether they’re still serving you.

Instructions:

  1. Write down your earliest memory associated with money.
  2. List significant financial events in your life, both “positive” and “negative.”
  3. Reflect on how these events have shaped your current money mindset and identify areas where you would like to change.

Play the Abundance Mindset Game

You can start exploring your values and priorities using the Abundance Mindset Game over the course of a few days.

Instructions:

  1. Start with a small amount, like $100, and decide how you would spend it.
  2. Double the amount each day and find ways to “spend” it.
  3. Note how your spending priorities change as the amount increases, and reflect on what this tells you about your values and priorities.

Start Money Mindset Coaching or Counseling

Crafting a healthy money mindset is a personal journey, one with ups, downs, and sometimes a few detours. It’s undeniably exhilarating yet equally daunting, isn’t it?

Having a seasoned guide in the form of a money mindset coach or counselor can not only provide a roadmap but also add a few delightful scenic routes to your journey, helping you explore corners of your mindset you perhaps hadn't ventured into before.

Curious about how this dynamic duo might work in your favor? We have the perfect primer for you. Listen to The Knomii Podcast episode on this very topic where therapist Cynthia and coach Madeline showcase the magic that happens when expertise meets empathy. It’s more than a discussion; it’s a master class in breaking down financial anxieties and rebuilding a mindset that is grounded, joyful, and yes, prosperous.

Consider it a sneak peek into the world of mindset coaching, one where wisdom meets wit, and strategies are sprinkled with a dose of reality — all wrapped up with the end goal of guiding you to a place of financial serenity and empowerment. Why walk alone when you can journey with experts who bring both heart and smarts to the table? Take a listen and entertain the thought; after all, every great journey begins with a single step, or in this case, a play button.